I went to Gleneagles hospital with my family yesterday, to visit my Mum’s auntie, whom is attacked by breast cancer (stage 4). That was my first time ever stepping into a hospital to visit a sick people. Really. My parent doesn’t encourage me to go except when my Mum gave birth to my bro and my auntie gave birth to my cousin.

Even like yesterday, it was my Mum only whom visited her auntie while the 3 of us wait at the waiting room downstairs. Her auntie just gone through her first chemotherapy and experienced a great hair loss problem already. One of her sons was there to accompany her. Don’t ask about her ignorant husband.

After the visit, my Dad said:
“You see, when her daughter gave birth, she took more than 20 hours flight to USA with her husband to do ‘guek lai’ (a term in Chinese, that lasts for a month or so) for her daughter. Now, when she is laying in the hospital for having breast cancer, the daughter cannot come back to see her. blablabla”

He related the above situation to me. Alright, this is probably my Dad’s biggest fear, that once I get married with the boyfriend and follow him to his country, I might not come back and visit him so often. Although Malaysia and Indonesia is not so far away, he still can’t shed the fear away.

Once, I felt so angry cause he didn’t trust me (that I won’t forget him and Mum and will visit them so often, no matter how far I stay, and that I will save a sum of money so I could book a flight home as often as possible).

But now I think I can’t blame him for feeling so, cause I seldom call back home while I was studying overseas. My reason back then was I didn’t have enough money to do so, I was busy, blablabla. Think again, if I have the heart to call back, I could actually put some money aside to buy an international calling card. *talking about regret* I’ll keep on convincing him and shed the fear away.

Well, well, this is just a thought on Monday. I shall get back to work instead of drowning myself into all this melancholy and sentimental feeling.